The Ring

 

Song:    Comfortably Numb (Pulse Concert)

Group:  Pink Floyd

As promised...

The Ring.

After having had written the last article...

I realized there is a movie titled...

The Ring.

Although I haven't seen it...

from the trailer...

I can only surmise it involved a predatory apparition appearing out of...

what is normally considered an enjoyable form of entertainment

in the safety of one's own home (A TV set).

I assure you...

especially in the context of this article...

it was not a Freudian Slip.

This article refers to an actual physical ring...

mine...

of what it represents...

and of what it portends for the immediate future. 

My wedding ring has been in its box for decades

(we had not gotten our rings until years after our wedding).

We had an extremely small wedding...

just her and I in a chapel at Lake Tahoe...

as we initially lived frugally...

and so...

we waited until my pay greatly increased so we could get the ones that we truly wanted

(we were not married until I was well into my career)...

and so...

it also represents a good choice I had made in my wife...

for any woman not willing to walk with me through hell...

shall not later walk with me through heaven 

(metaphorically speaking)...

and so...

it is her early dedication to me when I didn't have much...

that makes my appreciation of her even deeper

(always bet on the ants...and never on the grasshoppers in life).

I couldn't wear my ring at work...

not only because we weren't allowed to wear anything with stones in it...

but as my job had frequently involved physical altercations...

I didn't want to damage it.

But...

even since I had fully retired in 2011...

I still couldn't wear it...

as my ring and pinky fingers had been open fractured at work...

 right on the middle joints...

and even after hand surgery...

each joint of each affected finger was enlarged and sensitive...

so not only was it physically impossible to put on...

but it would have been so uncomfortable to wear even if I could have had the ring enlarged

(which I could not have, due to the embedded polished Onyx on each side of the ring).

The stone I had chosen is a dark and genuine Sapphire...

along with polished Onyx on each side...

 represents my deeply serene underlying natural mood... 

and the natural gold I chose (verses platinum or white gold)...

also represents my personality of not reflecting a perceived surface reality...

but one which is colored by a warmer and more welcoming reflected light...

and so...

all of which represent my personality

(I had designed the ring and had it custom made to match my personality).

I naturally have a deep personality...

one which is kept hidden...

and one that is far more intense and colorful

than what one would gather from a first appearance.

As like with so many other people...

we are not what we initially may seem to be...out of caution.

We are the ones who are in the corner quietly observing...

and who employ multiple sieves to avoid the implied social obligations

and ambushes employed by the manipulative predators and parasites of society.

And...

just as with my ring...

my personality only shows the depth of its colors when light is allowed to shine within

(it is a natural life strategy many people use (usually learned early in childhood)

to avoid being thought of as strange or otherwise targeted...and so...avoided...

so instead...

people often use the mask of a very harmless and simple country bumpkin...

to help bond with others...

as most people only want superficial bonding).

As you can see...

my ring now not only fits...

but it no longer causes pain or irritation to either of my previously 

swollen and sensitive fingers.

I just put it on for these photos...

and I then put it back in its box until later next month

(the significance of which I will shortly explain).

Although my pinky and ring fingers are only just recently relatively healed

(after a couple of decades)...

I don't have complete motion or range in them...

and I still don't receive accurate feedback from them so far as pressure 

or location in 3 D space...

as I had lost some feeling in them...

which not makes playing the guitar difficult (but is good therapy for my fingers)...

 I still inadvertently drop things out of my left hand due to not 

being able to accurately gauge the amount of pressure I am using

(I have broken many a dish and other items because of this  :)

---------

My wife's rings I will not go into now...

for she is extremely private 

(she didn't want me even mentioning her in my blogs...

partly because of her extremely private nature...

but she was also previously stalked and harassed before...

by a psycho woman who was attempting to dox her).

Ever since then...

she hadn't wanted to even be mentioned online...

until now...

well...

just so far as mentioning her.

But...

suffice it to say that her ring set was much more expensive than was mine.

I wanted her to always feel proud, like a queen, as she wore them.

But...

enough about our rings...

and on to the significance of mine for the future.

Although my wife and I have been married for several decades...

we have been geographically separated for going on 10 years now.

Due to circumstances in life which demanded our placement 

in two separate places at one time for such a long time...

(we chose to take care of loved ones who were unable to do for themselves at the time)

we could only visit each other every once in a while...

sometimes as long as a couple of years between visits.

She was the "guest" I mentioned in my blogs.

But...

starting late next month...

our need to be separated...

will finally come to an end...

and so...

it is when I put on my ring once again to signify the re-beginning of our lives

(except when I do heavy work outside).

She and I will finally be able to live the rest of our lives together...

and so...

it will be the ending of an era...

and the beginning of a new and adventurous one.

It is with her that we will see the most beautiful places in the world...

and eat the most delicious food.

---------

First...

a picture that she allowed of her from a distance and from behind:

(photo taken in 2024...just before my move to Colorado...

when she had briefly visited me where I lived in the mountains of Reno, NV)

My wife is on the left, as she and my elder sister (on the right)

 were walking toward Lake Tahoe...

and following along a paved trail...

where they had seen some of the most beautiful spots of Lake Tahoe 

(I followed behind on my trike...taking photos).

-------

As a basic summary of her...

she is but 4'11" and 95 lbs.

(149.86 centimeters...and 43 kilograms).

She is Japanese...

from Japan.

She had originally come from a small fishing village 

on the country island of Shikoku (we will be revisiting there early next year).

And although she grew up relatively poor...

she was never without a roof over her head...

or nutritious food in her belly

(and so...her frugal nature).

She is intelligent and organized...

has a strong work ethic and morals...

a high maternal instinct...

we are of very similar hearts and minds

as we both know how to make our own selves happy...

and we have a need for personal solitude at times to pursue our own personal passions...

but most of all...

she is absolutely crazy about me

(okay...I am going to pay for that one  :)

We also enjoy doing things together...

as we both love to travel to exotic locations throughout the world

(we will plan out our trips together)...

amateur photography...

being out in places of great natural beauty in nature...

sunrises and sunsets...

exploring new places to eat...

exercise (we will trike together as well)...

and we have similar personalities in so many other ways.

We are both...

very much...

ants.

We have always worked as a team...

striving toward our major goals in life

(not to say we didn't have our moments in a stormy sea...

but they were just momentary squalls we easily rode out).

From the beginning...

while we coordinated and worked together...

we had different areas of responsibilities.

She took care of the present...

and I took care of our future.

I was the Captain of our ship...

and she was the First Mate.

I ensured we had a very sturdy ship...

 I had plotted our course to our destination carefully...

and I navigated cautiously to ensure a smooth and safe journey...

but one which would still speed us along in a timely manner

by carefully considering money, as I was the sole provider...

and as such...

I not only ensured we could live well...

but that our future would be filled with even greater horizons to explore.

My wife took great care of the day to day operations...

running the household with efficiency and great economy...

and had even saved us up a small fortune as a result.

I had concentrated on making money...

not only through overtime and long term investments...

but through my retirement itself (which is quite substantial)...

and of which also protects her future as well...after I die...

as she not only comes from a long-lived people...

but she has naturally low blood pressure...

and as with me...

she does nothing deleterious to her body (doesn't drink or smoke)...

eats very healthfully and exercises...

while still being quite a bit younger than am I...

and so...

I expect her to outlive me by at least 15 - 30 years.

And so...

not only is our future secure and to be filled with many great adventures...

but after my death...

hers will also be financially secure...

so she will not have a worry about anything for the rest of her life.

And...

now...to make it even better...

one of my wife's new hobbies is learning how to invest money.

She now greatly enjoys making money grow

(and she has always loved learning new dishes to cook as one of her hobbies...

and this is one of the things I greatly missed...

her cooking...

as she is so much better at it than am I).

Although...

even though we will be eating her cooking almost exclusively...

as she loves veggies and fish (as do I)...

I will specialize in BBQ and smoked meats...

and very large batch cooking...

for occasional meals...

and of course...

we will be eating out fairly often as we explore our area 

for our favorite restaurants and the many different cuisines available.

---------

And so...

back to the significance of The Ring.

As anyone knowing of my first writing effort...

The Kuma Trilogy...

and of my emphasis on the various rings carefully chosen...

and of the deep meanings behind them from the various characters...

it was, of course, taken from my own life...

 through the manifestation of my particular view on life...

 of putting forethought into everything important...

as without meaning put forth...

no meaning in life is derived.

My Smith & Wesson M&P 2.0 10mm

 

Song:  Fantasy (cover of original by Earth, Wind, And Fire)

Group:  Leonid & Friends

As today was the day for me to pick up my gun...

I was feeling upbeat...

and so...

the above song 

(I played it repeatedly there and back...

while attempting to sing to it...

attempting to mind you  :)

I was just heading down my mountain...

when I saw...

Bambi :)

Back at my favorite taco truck in Woodland Park

I had ordered 6 carne asada (steak) tacos.

I put verde (green sauce) on 3 of them...

along with the diced onions and cilantro and squeezed lime...

and on the other three...

I just omitted the verde...

as I sometimes like more of the meat flavor to come through.

Street tacos are just jam packed with meat.

I ate my fill.

Those tacos should quell my taco cravings for quite some time.

I then stopped in at the gun shop to pick up my 10mm...

and then headed home.

I was just a few miles from home here.

This is my Smith & Wesson M&P 2.0 4" Barrel 10mm.

It fits my hand perfectly.

I am currently awaiting delivery of my hard cast bear loads

(UPS delivery to my door).

They are supposed to arrive anywhere from now to the next few hours.

I had also ordered many accessories to add to my gun's functionality...

 some of which should arrive today in the mail...

while some others won't arrive until next week.

Once everything arrives...

I will strip down the weapon and modify some of the parts inside...

as well as in the magazines.

While this is a very good gun...

I will be firing extra heavy bullets (Buffalo Bore 220 grain)...

much heavier than standards bullets (standard bullets weigh between 155 to 180) 

as the 220 grain bullets are designed for extra penetration in a large bear or moose 

as the extra mass will provide the necessary momentum...

and as they are hard cast...

they will not fragment or flatten.

They are specifically designed to penetrate thick hide, bone, and muscle

to reach the vitals for a quick takedown in case of an emergency situation involving 

a charging bull moose or large grizzly bear

(these particular loads are a favorite in Alaska for a backup 10mm weapon).

As such...

even though it is a 10mm...

the gun wasn't tuned to the extra power and weight of the bear loads 

I will be using exclusively.

And so...

I will be replacing the stock 17 lb recoil spring and guide rod

with a much beefier recoil spring (24 lb) and heavy duty guide rod...

as well as putting in heavier springs in each of the magazines...

as the much larger rounds are heavier...

and a weak magazine spring may cause a misfeed due 

to the greater weight of the 15 rounds.

I will also be taking it out to a local outdoor firing range 

so I may run the gun through its paces under full bear loads to ensure

there are no gun malfunctions.

I will also be installing the new night/low light gun sights...

and zeroing them using a bore laser...

and I will mount the under slide flashlight.

But...

I must wait until all of my accessories and tool kit arrives.

Don't worry...

I had actually been sent to an armorer's (gun smithing) school

deep in the mountains of Northern California...

albeit decades ago...

in my old profession.

I had learned how to completely tear down each type of weapon...

and diagnose and repair problems

in revolvers...

 semi auto handguns and rifles...

and their magazines...

as well as shotguns.

I also learned how to modify parts to rectify problems...

or to simply make the guns run more smoothly.

However...

to tell the truth...

all guns are made to be simple...

rugged, and reliable...

and so...

most of it is just common sense.

Hopefully...

there will be no problems...

as my life will depend on it firing flawlessly

if I ever have to use it

(I am also well practiced in emergency clearing operations should a misfeed occur).

And so...

until I make the modifications...

and thoroughly test it...

I still have my boar spear  :)

------------

There is a particular reason I need to be ready with everything...

by the end of next month.

I will soon be explaining everything

in a future article I am thinking of titling...

The Ring.

My Trip To Freedom Arms

 

Song:  Imaginary

Group:  Evanescence

Today I went to Freedom Arms in Woodland Park.

I went to purchase a 10mm pistol so I may open carry it 

during Bandi's forest bathroom trips...

whether it be in the day or night.

I will also open carry it during my cycling around my mountain...

or in other wilderness areas around Colorado as I trike.

Just a little ways outside of Woodland Park.

Freedom Arms in Woodland Park.

I always try to support small businesses...

especially in or near my community.

This young salesman was very helpful.

I had originally thought to buy a Gen 5 Glock in 10mm...

however, he said they are not made anymore...

as they are coming out with a new model...

and that they didn't have the new model.

I had originally wanted a Glock as I used to carry a Glock in my old profession...

and I was used to its safety trigger and feel.

He then offered me to try a different maker in 10mm.

It was a Smith & Wesson 10mm.

As I held it...

I realized that the curves made it perfectly fit my hand...

even better than had the Glock...by far...

and the aggressive checkering on the grip just felt so positive

and reassuring that it would naturally ensure the same grip automatically...

which then ensured an automatic and consistent initial sight picture.

This is extremely important as it allows for immediate and intuitive aiming...

for fast and accurate shooting.

As I looked at the trigger...

I realized that it had the same trigger safety and striker plate tech of the Glock...

and the magazines dropped out immediately upon hitting the release...

very smoothly and without a hitch...

which is extremely important when doing quick reload sequences

when faced with multiple threats.

Racking the slide was also very easy as it had ribbed patterns built into the slide...

and it operated so smoothly.

This was also a 4" barrel...

perfect for my needs as I will only be using it for 

emergency surprise and very close encounters with a large moose or bear as I cycle...

or as I am taking Bandi to the forest to use the bathroom at home.

I won't be using it for target practice or longer distance shots...

and so...

I won't be needing a 6" barrel.

And even more importantly...

 the 4" barrel will allow for a smoother and quicker fast draw from the holster...

as when I may have to do so...

it will be in an extremely rapidly evolving life or death situation.

Never had I had a pistol feel just so right in my hand.

It has a familiar and comforting feel...

as if it were to say to my gun hand...

"Welcome home" :)

I am so glad the salesman had pointed me in this direction...

because for me...

it is an even better buy for me than would have been the Glock.

I will pick it up this Friday...

and although I still need many other items to complete this gun package...

I will be buying them online...

as this store was out of so many of the things I still need

(High power hard cast Bear loads - 3 boxes / chest holster with extra mag holders / 

2 extra 15 round mags (it came with two 15 round mags) / night / low light sights / 

a mountable wide angle bright flashlight / complete cleaning and tool kits / 

and a bore laser so I may zero the new sights once I swap them out).

And...

as one doesn't need to have any special skills to attach and align the accessories...

I will be doing all of the work myself.

I will detail more about this gun once I pick it up on Friday.

I was feeling good about my purchase...

and just down the street was my favorite taco truck.

There are two types of tacos that I love...

 American style with more veggies in it...

and true Mexican street style tacos...

of which is comprised of mostly meat.

I sometimes crave one or the other...

and today...

I just deeply craved street tacos.

I had ordered one carne asada taco (steak)...

and three Queso Birria tacos (shredded beef with cheese and dipping sauce).

It had been awhile since I had had a carne asada taco.

I should have just ordered all four tacos as carne asada.

I had forgotten how delicious they are.

The meat is slightly charred while still being juicy and tender.

They are now my favorite type of street taco once again.

With freshly chopped onions and cilantro...

which are then drizzled with a freshly squeezed lime wedge...

it just demonstrates why Mexican food is a world class cuisine...

as, especially with the taco...

they are just so delicious and satisfying that they are highly addictive.

Sometimes...

I just have to have them.

When I pick up my gun this Friday...

I will be certain to stop back in at my favorite taco truck...

to get nothing but carne asada tacos.

I am already looking forward to eating them again.

My drive home was as relaxing and serene as ever...

as I had been doubly satisfied...

my new gun purchase...

and having had a soul satisfying meal.

Nearing home in this photo.

I just love the clouds of Colorado.

To me...

they are flying pieces of art.

A Sweet Love Affair

 

Song:  Sweet Love

Group:  The Commodores

I was going to go to the gun shop in Woodland Park today...

but they are closed on Mondays

(I will be going tomorrow).

And so...

I was just going to pick up my mail from the mailboxes just down the mountain...

and which lay adjacent to the main county road leading to all of the towns.

However...

once I got to mailboxes...

the mailman was still filling them...

and as it takes 1-2 hours for him to finish our area...

I decided I might as well go into Cripple Creek to eat lunch...

and then stop by the mailboxes on the way home.

I was nearing the county road here.

After getting on the main county road...

Cripple Creek is but a 5-10 minute drive into town.

I decided to go back to The District to try a different meat taco.

As it was prime lunch hour...

I sat at the bar (even though I don't drink)...

and watched TV...

as I knew all orders are delayed during rush hour of any restaurant

(I usually avoid peak times...

but I wasn't planning on eating out.

I just wanted to kill some time before picking up my mail).

On one TV...

they had two TV stations I had never heard of...

Drone TV...

and Red Bull TV (extreme sports).

I was pleasantly occupied with these two channels

(they played outtakes of each in turn).

I wasn't so hungry...

so...

I just had chips and salsa...

... crunchy fish tacos...

and black bean stew.

There are quite a few different types of tacos I want to try.

Next time I will get the steak fajita tacos.

On my way home to check the mail.

I had arrived to find the mailman still filling the mailboxes (behind me)...

and so...

I just drove back home.

 I will just pick up my mail tomorrow on the way back from the gun shop.

These free roaming cows are fun to look at.

They seem so content...

as it must seem to be heaven for them to be grazing freely wherever they wish...

and just lying in the sun once they had gotten their fill of the delicious weeds and grasses.

I love my home...

my community...

the other communities where I often go...

and of everywhere I have been throughout Colorado.

It is to have every convenience near enough...

without losing the serenity of the open country.

The weather is so good...

the mountainous views and clouds are breathtaking...

especially the radiant sunrises and sunsets...

the mountain breezes and country air are so cool and refreshing...

animals abound in their natural setting...

and people are friendly and polite.

It is a sweet love affair I have with it all...

and of which rewards me so deeply on a daily basis.

My life is just so enchanting and sublime here...

it is my dream home.

It is to feel as if I were gliding from one exquisite view to another...

as everywhere I look...

from season to glorious season...

it is a never ending source of peaceful serenity.

I am ...

and will always be...

 until my death...

in the honeymoon phase of retirement (I fully retired in 2011)...

for life just keeps getting better...

and my enjoyment of life keeps growing greater...

and with an even more magical future on my horizon...

things I have only imagined will soon be coming true.

It is all because...

I am an ANT.

I know of many other people who have also chased and achieved

 their dream homes and lives.

All of them are long term thinkers...

had always practiced deferred gratification and future think (the ants)...

and had always known what made them happy in life...

and so...

had guided their lives towards their beautiful envisioned lives.

-----------

To have a sweet love of life...

is THE dream to chase...

for without this fundamental and deep happiness...

no matter your surroundings...

you will just chase your immediate gratification at the expense of your future...

with meaningless boredom killers

(and dream killers...by design...

as by killing your dreams...

you think to kill any guilt associated with your choice of being a grasshopper...

or even more...you blame the nebulous "society" for your own failures).

As you age...

and your options keep narrowing...

you will become that bitter old man or woman...

the one nobody wishes to be around...

as you don't even like yourself...

and so...

you begin to hate life.

Envy and spitefulness than becomes your cope in the miserable "life" 

you, yourself, had created.

Conversely...

you don't have to have a dream house to be deeply happy.

An internally happy person is blessed in life already...

as they have a deep appreciation for all they have...

and of all of the great simple pleasures in life.

As you continually chase your dreams...

of having hope and great expectations...

the anticipation of your coming paradise in life...

of being on the correct road to the achievement of your dreams...

is, in and of itself...

a self created heaven.

But...

with proper forethought...

you may have it all.

----------

It is all about proper time and resource management.

But...

in order for you to put any real value to them...

you simply MUST look honestly at your own eventual death as a certainty.

This sets the timeline from which everything in life must be based.

To not value death...

is to not value life.

It is in knowing that our time is limited that makes life so magical...

so valuable.

To pretend that life is filled with endless amounts of time and resources...

is to sabotage your drive from the beginning.

Although it is your dream which provides you with the drive to improve your lot in life...

along with an intelligently planned and plotted life...

directly coupled to positive and meaningful action until you achieve fruition...

all of these are absolutely necessary.

If you notice...

it takes the three pillars of life to achieve this.

Emotional: It is the emotions which arouse the subconscious to provide the continuing drive...

which further rewards through positive emotions...

creating a self reinforcing loop of endless drive

of the motor and drivetrain in your vehicle in life.

Intellectual:  It is the mind which converts the power of the motor...

into a plan of action...

giving you direction...

a destination with a designated efficient and effective route.

It is the driver of your vehicle.

Physical:  The actual actions taken following the route laid out by the intellect.

These are the wheels and tires (of which converts the drive into usable motion)...

without which...

you would end up going nowhere...

no matter how powerful the engine (amount of drive)...

and no matter the steering input from the driver (the greatness of the plan).

Although...

with the previous two being solid...

the physical usually follows suit...

however...

because of discomfort, pain, or fear...

people will often find excuses to not execute the actual plan.

Of course...

this is all common sense.

Yet...

so many people do any number of things to sabotage their own lives.

It is more than sad...

it is infuriating.

If you decouple the three...

and especially...

follow merely the emotional...

it tends to lead to a state of discombobulated thinking...

and so...an unrealistic view of, and relationship with, reality...

leading into subsequent actions which sabotage any realistic way of living

which the person could have had...

especially when made into something permanent.

-----------

But...

the most common sabotage used by the feckless...

is one of killing the dream...

and so...

the drive.

These are the grasshoppers...

who choose immediate gratification over long term gain.

Strangely enough...

although I don't really know...

but I can only surmise...

perhaps they had somehow developed a fatalistic view of life...

perhaps because they see death as a hopeless scenario of wasted effort...

and so...

in deciding to merely get what pleasure they could at each moment...

they had sought out any distraction to elevate themselves out of their depression.

Again...

I don't know.

I have never lost hope...

and I have never experienced depression...

and so...

I really don't understand their way of thinking.

But...

I do know that they tend to abuse drugs of all types...

pharmaceutical as well as legal drugs or illicit ones...

to escape their despondency because of a lack of hope in their ability 

to provide themselves long term happiness...

not realizing that instead of seeking the immediate highs at the expense of their own

long term health and happiness...

that if they merely paid themselves forward through their planning and efforts...

with the fruition of each objective...

their highs in life become permanent...

and self reinforcing...

 which then provides for an easier walk forwards 

with each subsequent objective completed.

---------

As I love life so much...

I want others to also love life.

Again...

although it can be thought of as simply selfish of me...

as I get pleasure from helping others...

because...

once again...

it automatically doubles pleasure in life

(that of giving...as well as that of receiving)...

and so...

makes me love life even more.

Who cares?

I certainly don't.

It is the actions of people in the face of duty...

the inactions of people in the face of temptation...

and the reactions of people to those deemed to be at a disadvantage to them...

which actually determines their inner goodness...

and which actually determines what they are inside.

I am a good person...

and this allows me to fully enjoy life.

It is to be free from the bindings which tie the wings of the emotions...

allowing me to soar the skies among the clouds of the mind...

and so...

to deeply feel and treasure all of the great simple pleasures of life.

As a fundamentally good person...

I suffer from earned guilt...

and from earned shame.

And so...

in order to soar the skies of my mind...

I must not only not do anything which would evoke those negative emotions...

I must fulfill my duty to help guide others...

thereby stimulating positive emotions in me...

because that is the only way to live a wonderful life.

In this manner...

I earn the transcendent beauty of sunrises and sunsets...

of feeling music to the depth of my soul...

of having the appetite for great feasts...

and experiencing the deep serenity and grand beauty of all of life...

and without which...

having a sweet love affair with life would be impossible.